It’s Hump Day, and the last one before The Redeemer of Mankind’s birthday. What better way to celebrate the Savior’s immaculate conception then subsequent vaginal delivery than by reading the Update? I can think of no other…
The redesigned and reconfigured START Treaty between the US and Russia will now be signed by Barack. The treaty hit some major snags last week because of Republicans (eager to do nothing before the end of session) dragged their feet and refused to vote on the measure, calling it ‘too rushed.’ The treaty has been under construction since its original draft in 2002, and this version has been under negotiations for almost two years. New stipulations that were agreed upon say that both countries will limit their stocks of warheads to 1550, down 30% from the amount agreed upon in 2002. Each nation is allowed only 800 nuclear capable subs, and only 700 of them can be armed at once. 700 nuclear warheads is enough to level every city from London to Moscow, frankly, and though the measure is a great effort, still allows for unspeakable damage. A major drawback that riled politicians for both nations was the lack of limitations or regulations on building missile shields, a major goal for the US. Obama said the treaty would not stop or limit in anyway the US’s plan to help build and fund a missile shield over Europe….
Obama loves to open negotiations by breaking out the ol’ coloring book….
Another shining Republican moment as the Elephants waver on the commitment to ensure free health care for the surviving responders, mainly New York Fire Department workers. Republicans, who certainly made the most of 9/11 (Afghanistan, Iraq, the Patriot Act, George W. Bush in a second term) are now voting against giving roughly 343 first responders health coverage. Due to the prolonged exposure (they were pulling out bodies, folks, come on) to toxic fumes and materials at Ground Zero, many of these responders are suffering with breathing, heart and cancer issues as a result. Democrats believed they have gathered enough support to pass the $6.2 benefits package, though Republicans are entrenched against it…Why? They claim it costs too much. A three trillion dollar war (Iraq) costs too much. Health care for these firefighters should be already covered by a national health care system. But that is, of course, a whole other Update entirely…
A bomb was found in outside of Rome yesterday in a busy train station. Italian security responded but found that, due to the bombs poor construction, it could not have been detonated. Let this be a chilling reminder of how routine terror is becoming…We now wave off bombs if they don’t explode…
WikiLeaks founder, and Bond-villain-to-be Julian Assange appeared on BBC’s Today program to be interviewed by John Humphrys. In the interview, Assange said he believed the sexual assault charges awaiting him in Sweden were baseless and obviously contrived to make him look like a villain (the white hair already does, Julian) while he is making an effort not to let the distraction of legal charges interfere with his WikiLeaks mission. Even international figures admit that the sexual assault charges were probably organized and set-up by the American CIA after WikiLeaks released thousands of cables some weeks ago. There is even irony in this amusing little aside; the charges of sexual assault against Assange were ‘leaked’ by top authorities in the Swedish police force days before enough evidence was gathered to merit an office warrant. The Bohunk can readily admit that Assange is, an all likelihood, a shady character, especially with women. He has claimed quite grandiose success with them, but this proclamation only makes the charges against him more understandable. But to have two women just-so-happen to file charges against Assange a few days after the cable leaks is a bit too convenient…
For NFL news, we turn to Washington, home of the Native Americans. They traded for Donovan McNabb, gave him a fat contract, then pulled him that very week because he was too chubby to run a two minute offense. At that point, the Bohunk was forced to declare, “Bullshit.” Head coach Mike Shanahan billed himself as a genius, though he was only a genius with John Elway back in Denver, and, lest ye forgot, Elway is going to be remembered as one of the greatest quarterbacks in history. Now, after losing games because of poor coaching and poor play, the scapegoat is Donovan McNabb. Was the Chunky Soup Eater playing Pro-Bowl football? No. But was anyone else playing well either? His team was bad, on both sides of the ball, and even on special teams. Shanahan was consistently outcoached (by Andy Reid, especially) and shifted blame to Albert Haynesworth and the new signing, McNabb. Soon, people will see that Shanahan is a mediocre coach with a sub-par team, and likely fire him accordingly.
Natalie Portman as the Black Swan…It ain’t Queen Amidala, but still pretty good…
If you are looking for a holiday movie, might I recommend Black Swan starring Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis. Why, you ask, would the Bohunk, a throbbingly attractive manly-man, suggest I go see a movie about ballet? And I would answer you like this: It stars Natalie Portman as a crazy, whigged-out ballerina battling another startling attractive ballerina. It is a dark, psychotic look at how insane ballerinas really are. And, again, it stars Natalie Portman.
In the on-going piece on the evolution of Christmas (that was carefully selected, evolution of…) we come to another Roman holiday, the feast of Mithras, the god of light, which, not-so-coincidentally, fell on December 25th. The festival was based on the theme of renewing hope, and was celebrated by lighting candles and eating. Christians adopted this date as the birth of Christ in the 4th century, roughly 400 years after Jesus died and pointedly ignoring suggested dates of his birth that even now range from September to February. Christians selected a well-liked and well-entrenched holiday as the birth so that Gentiles would be more likely to accept the holiday as Christian if they could be converted to the new faith. But hey, if you can convince people that bread and wine is the body and blood of the Savior, and then get them to ingest said ‘blood and wine’, I think convincing them a certain day was the Messiah’s birthday shouldn’t be an issue.
It’s nearly Christmas, so your sleigh better be stacked high. Tie down the hatch of your Ford Fiesta and fit in, amongst your roasted chestnuts and Lady Gaga posters, a final gift. The Bohunk, a steady ready, has been tempted by The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson ever since it was a huge hit at the local movie house. It was a #1 National Bestseller and a phenomena in Europe, and Larsson’s native Sweden, in particular, long before it was even known in the US. Larsson died of a heart attack before his work became famous, adding even more mystery and intrigue to what is said be a thrilling mystery in the trilogy. Now, all three novels are available in paperback, meaning you can get all three (the others are The Girl Who Played With Fire and The Girl Who Kicked The Hornet’s Nest) for less than the cost of a single hardcover copy. You can pick them up here, or head in to your local bookseller.
Thanks for reading, get a book for someone you love this holiday season, and here’s to hoping you had an excellent pagan Winter Solstice this week. Back tomorrow, enjoy Modern Family at 9 tonight. (As always, that’s Eastern Standard)
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